Mediation Is Better Process For Divorce

April 26, 2010

From the Real Divorce Mediation Blog of Nancy Hudgins and Debra Synovec

Last Thursday I had the opportunity to hear Gloria Steinem, author and activist, famous for the Women’s Liberation Movement, speak at a fundraising luncheon for the YWCA. She spoke in part about how empowerment starts with the least powerful. She then gave her ideas about what the world would be like if the YWCA ran it……imagine…..differences would be celebrated rather than being regarded as negatives; hierarchal systems would be replaced with more humane systems and ultimately we would return to our instinctual nature to help each other rather than to compete with each other.

I wonder……what would happen if all divorce and family law matters went straight to facilitated, interest based mediation rather than to the courthouse, our hierarchal traditional approach which often exploits people, focuses on differences, is power based valuing win/lose, control and superiority and pits on family member against the other. Mediation allows and encourages people to work together, to show natural empathy for each other and to find common ground and the best alternative for all. What would happen if people getting divorced were guided to their natural instinct to have empathy and work for the benefit of all rather than being led to battle………..Let me guess:

· Parents and children would feel better and smile sooner….

· Agreements would be more durable……..

· The process would be less painful and more empowering………that’s what would happen!

I am sure the list could go on and on …..what do you think? We would like to know.

Debra Synovec

Debra Synovec, a Seattle-based mediator and lawyer, has mediated divorces for 20 years. She believes in empowering the parties to reach their own resolution. MORE >