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<xTITLE>Holiday Parenting Doesn’t Have To Be A “War of the Roses” Part I</xTITLE>

Holiday Parenting Doesn’t Have To Be A “War of the Roses” Part I

by Jeff Murphy
November 2011

Kalamazoo Mediation by Jeff Murphy

Jeff Murphy

This is the first in a series of short blogs to help you avoid a parenting problem in the next few weeks – the dreaded “Holidays”.

It’s a shame so much stress and tension surrounds Thanksgiving and Christmas. Too many movies are made about the sometimes ugly get-togethers with relatives who don’t get along the rest of the year and don’t want to see each other now, but feel obliged to. Added to this is the problem of divorced couples with less than perfect parenting plans and the uncertainty as to whether the “ex” will live up to holiday schedules made at the time of the divorce. Divorce lawyers all have stories of phone calls received just days before Christmas from clients demanding help to get the ex to live up to the schedule. The caller has found out too late that his/her ex is taking the kids to New York to visit his/her family when they were supposed to be here with his/her family from Iowa.

If you haven’t checked lately with your “ex”, there’s still plenty of time to make a call or send an email to find out whether he/she’s going to meet his/her obligations or if you will have to have the lawyer obtain a court order in your favor. Don’t wait until December 23rd to find out.


Jeff Murphy is a trained mediator and an attorney with over 35 years of business, civil and commercial legal experience. He was born and raised in New York CIty where he attended Columbia and Fordham. He ventured westward to join The Upjohn Company years ago and served as Senior Counsel for their Agricultural Division. He has written numerous articles on mediation in addition doing presentations to groups, associations and businesses on the topic in an effort to educate people on the benefits of mediation over litigation.  Mediate, don't litigate!    

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