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<xTITLE>A Christmas Gift for Mediators</xTITLE>

A Christmas Gift for Mediators

by Monique McKay
December 2011 Monique McKay

My mediator friend recently had a birthday. As it happens, his birthday is a really big deal to him. I don’t mean just on the five or ten year markers but every year. If you happened to come up with a really clever idea one year, it is expected that you will be even cleverer the following year. I have always been able to come up with great gifts for my mom, my sister, and my girlfriends. After all, you can always default to buying two of something you like and “voila” a girlfriend gift appears. But the men in my life bring a different struggle….

Ties are out of the question. Gift cards are an insult. A fabulous piece of art was inspired but is now so last year. We drive and get lost a lot so a navigation system would be good if he didn’t already have two. What to do?  How about a CD to listen to while, despite the multiple navigation systems, we are facing the sign for the Santa Monica Airport despite trying to get to LAX or heading out of the wrong traffic circle exit yet again in DC. But not just any CD will do. It will have to be personal. A store bought CD will not do. After many hours of searching for relevant songs I came up with the perfect 2011 gift. It may also do for other hard-to-buy-for mediators or you may find comfort in it if, you too, spend a lot of time on the road. It roughly tracks what might happen in a mediation from positions taken, to sharing perspectives, to pressure points to settle and movement and finally, to understanding and resolution. There are several great artists represented and lots of emotion weaved throughout in what I think is a pleasing manner to the ear. Let me know if you think of other songs that fit into the theme and compilation. Christmas is right around the corner….

  • I Won’t Back Down by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
  • Games People Play by The Alan Parsons Project
  • Peace by Weezer
  • Walk A Mile In My Shoes by Elvis Presley
  • We Just Disagree by Dave Mason
  • Try to See it My Way by The Beatles
  • Why Can't We Be Friends? By War
  • I’m Sorry by Advent
  • Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word by Elton John
  • Hard To Say I'm Sorry by Chicago
  • You Can't Always Get What You Want  by The Rolling Stones
  • Under Pressure by Queen and David Bowie
  • I Can See Clearly Now by Jimmy Cliff
  • Reconciliation Blues by Sounds of Blackness
  • Better Together by Jack Johnson
  • The Resolution by Jack’s Mannequin
  • The Resolution by Nick Lachey
  • Peace Train by Cat Stevens
  • Imagine by John Lennon
  • Resolution by Prince

Any other suggestions?


Monique is the co-founder and Director of the Master Mediator Institute and co-mediates complex, multi-party commercial, personal injury, catastrophic loss and medical malpractice cases with Robert Creo. She also has experience in community mediation including neighborhood disputes, juvenile issues and victim-offender cases. Her commercial experience includes employment, real estate and family business cases. She designs conflict resolution systems with Business Excellence Solutions.   Monique has conducted extensive research in the field of self-government for Indigenous peoples in Canada and has expertise in restorative justice and Indigenous legal and governance issues.  Monique holds a Diploma in Journalism, a BA and an LL.B. from the University of Western Ontario and a Masters in Law in Dispute Resolution (LL.M.) from Pepperdine University.   

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