An Alternative to Colosseum of Family Court (5/20/12)
Stephen Erickson
Steve Erickson discusses the view from family court. He left the practice of family law for family mediation, looking for a less aggressive alternative to resolving family disputes.

On Beating Bullies (5/14/12)
Michael Jacobs
Tackling bullying may involve a counter-intuitive approach. While naming and shaming may leave us feeling morally superior, it might also produce ever more subtle forms of bullying. This article argues that we need to encourage those of us who feel like kicking butts to ‘come in from the cold’.   3 Comments

How Good Emailing Can Improve a Bad Relationship (5/14/12)
Susanna Jani
Today, you are in for a real treat. Jane Henderson, Q.C., our perennially popular blogger and member of our distance mediation team, is back with another of her signature frank, but light-hearted, posts. I hope you are settled into a comfortable chair because this is one you’ll want to read to the end!

Sixty Things You Can Do This Week (5/06/12)
Diana Mercer
Below is a list of 60 simple tasks that you can get started on this week. These are designed to be simple tasks that you can do to market your arbitration or mediation practice. It is an excerpt from The Peace Talks Marketing Book.

A Divorce Lawyer's Suggestions For Mediators (5/06/12)
Scott Morgan
This article offers advice from a practicing divorce attorney to mediators who are handling divorce cases. He offers his thoughts on how to best resolve difficult divorce cases. Addressed are issues such as whether there should be any limitations as to the parties being allowed to “vent,” whether joint sessions are helpful in divorce mediations, how to handle the situation when one side claims they are not able to settle because they are missing information, and whether potential court outcomes should be discussed.   5 Comments

The Best Interests of Children: Negotiating in the Shadow of the Law (4/30/12)
Susanna Jani
Today, it is my privilege to publish a post about what is undoubtedly the single most important consideration for separating parents — including when they are participating in family mediation.

The Secret Language Divorce Lawyers Speak (4/23/12)
Laurie Israel
Lawyers often use idioms rather than legal terms to explain concepts and strategies in divorce law to our clients. Somehow, these idiomatic terms are more descriptive and powerful in describing the dynamics and techniques that are present in a divorce than any other type of language.

Think Before you Move-In (4/23/12)
Jeff Murphy
A recent study showed that couples who began their lives together by co-habiting before marriage had a higher rate of divorce than those who waited until the knot was tied. This article discusses the downside of co-habitation.

No Divorcing Please, We’re British (4/17/12)
Jeff Murphy
We have “no-fault divorce” here in the States, but in the U.K. a party suuing for divorce still has to prove cause. Officially the grounds are such serious matters as adultery and abandonment, but it seems the courts will take just about anything presented.

The Revolution in Family Law Dispute Resolution (4/12/12)
John Lande
In the past fifty years, the revolution in American family law led to a revolution in family law dispute resolution. Virtually every aspect of divorce law has been transformed since the Mad Men era, including grounds for divorce, characterization of marital property, child custody presumptions, and alimony and child support rules. Marriage is not assumed to be a lifelong commitment. Fault generally is not legally relevant. Gender equality is a fundamental principle.

Is it Time to Go? (4/09/12)
Jeff Murphy
Check out the article about divorce counseling in the personal Journal section of the April 3, 2012 issue of the Wall Street journal: www.wsj.com.

The State of Community Mediation (3/19/12)
Justin Corbett
The National Association for Community Mediation (NAFCM) has released its much-anticipated new report: The State of Community Mediation. This fieldwide assessment is the most comprehensive in nearly a decade, and includes many never-before reported statistics detailing the size, scope, and impact of the the community practice area.

Unresolved Conflict and Your Anger About It (3/12/12)
Tammy Lenski
Last summer, when I was in Colorado to speak at the Association for Conflict Resolution’s Rocky Mountain Retreat, I met a woman whose energy, warmth and charisma swept through any room she was in.

Do Children Fare Better in a Mediated or Litigated Divorce? (3/05/12)
Howard Chusid
Sometimes, parents think that only they are getting divorced and the children aren't adult enough to merit being heard. This is a major mistake that may fester and manifest into problems in the future. Poor grades at school, stomach aches, missing school days, getting up late, not listening to teachers, alcohol and drug use are just some of the ways that children and adults react to the stress and acrimony of divorce.   4 Comments

My “Big Three” BC Family Law Information Powerhouses (3/05/12)
Susanna Jani
It comes as no surprise that many of our readers have been wondering about British Columbia’s new Family Law Act. I confess to wondering about it also. It has been quite a few months since it received Royal Assent, and the suspense about it is beginning to grow.

Conflict: The Best Feedback Process There Is! (2/28/12)
Liz Rivers
Lets face it – most of us are terrified of conflict. Our hardwired responses are either to ignore it in the hope it will go away or to treat it as a fight that we must win at all costs in order to preserve our self image. Believe me, after 20 years as a mediator I am not immune to this once I’m off duty. My secret shame is how I lose my rag with people in call centres.

To Be Angry in Negotiation or Not to Be Angry? That is the Question (2/28/12)
Taly Harel-Marian
It is common sense that strong emotions, like anger, play an important role in negotiations. Research shows that people in negotiations are more likely to give in to an angry counterpart than to a neutral or happy counterpart.

When it ain’t Easy to Say the Right Thing: How Distance Mediators Help (2/28/12)
Susanna Jani
“The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.” (Mark Twain). I wish I’d seen that quote years ago, when I was in the midst of my own separation. In hindsight, I can say without hesitation that many of the discussions I had with my ex about how to reorganize our lives went sideways for no other reason than that I didn’t understand how important my choice of words actually was.

Mediation and the Two Wolves in Us (2/13/12)
Susanna Jani
I had that familiar, sinking feeling last night when I started cleaning out the inbox for my personal e-mails. My old friend, Procrastination, had left me with a stack of messages whose fate needed deciding — 549 in total. The feeling evaporated, though, the moment I started rereading an e-mail that had come from an acquaintance quite some time ago.

Seven Tips for Setting Boundaries and Consequences with Teens (2/06/12)
Lorraine Segal
One huge source of conflict and stress for parents of teens is figuring out how to set appropriate guidelines and consequences and then follow through successfully. Here are some tips and suggestions based on communication and conflict resolution principles.

Prenups – Don’t Lawyer Up, Mediate! (2/01/12)
Laurie Israel
Prenup articles typically talk about how resolving and clarifying money issues prior to marriage is a good thing.   However, they do not take into account the very important component of most good marriages: the sharing of money and resources.  So prenups aren't necessarily the best thing since sliced bread -- they can pose many problems for the future spouses.

Canadian Report Encourages Specific Training and Standards for Elder Mediation (1/31/12)
Keith Seat

In the growing area of elder mediation, which now includes mandatory mediation of adult guardianship issues in British Columbia, a new report calls for mediation practice guidelines, training and ethical standards. The report from the Canadian Centre for Elder Law emphasizes the heightened sensitivity and skill needed by mediators. Ethical issues include determining whether parties have the capacity to participate meaningfully in mediation, the need for legal representation and questions of abuse and neglect.

Canadian Lawyer Legal Feeds (January 16, 2012)

Family Law Council Files Rare Amicus Over Mediation Issue (1/30/12)
Victoria VanBuren
The council submitted the brief on Jan. 9, urging the Supreme Court to grant a mandamus to force a family law judge to approve a mediated settlement agreement (MSA) in a custody dispute. The judge in that suit, 309th District Judge Sheri Dean of Houston, refused to approve the MSA between Stephanie Lee and Benjamin Jay Redus, on the ground it was not in the best interest of a child. The council argues in the amicus that the judiciary should not create common-law exceptions to the enforceability of MSAs.

Going Deeper in Mediation (1/23/12)
Rachel Fishman Green, Esq.
This article looks at going deeper in mediation. Specifically, how to resolve zero-sum divorce disputes through mediation. This case study examines detailed scenarios and arguments that often arise in divorce mediations.

Divorce (In Itself) Does Not Pose Risk For Children (1/01/12)
Andra Brosh
“It is not divorce in itself that can lead to problems in children. It is the divorce linked to interparental conflict, a lack of co-parenting, an unsuitable family climate, etc.,” according to Priscila Comino, a researcher at the University of the Basque Country’s (UPV/EHU) Faculty of Psychology.