Mediate.com - Complete information about mediation and mediators
--   --
-- -- --    
Follow Mediate.com on TwitterMediate.com Videos on YouTube
ALL SECTIONS  |   ABOUT MEDIATION  |   Civil  |   Commercial  |   Community  |   Elder  |   Family  |   ODR  |   Public Policy  |   Workplace
Subscribe to the Mediate.com NewsletterSign Up Now
Mediators Arbitrators Online Mediators Online Arbitrators
Parenting Coordinators Facilitators Collaborative Professionals Mediating Lawyers

Mediate.com Web Site Package


Family & Divorce Mediation Articles



Archived Content: Custody | Divorce | Elder | Gay
FEATURED MEDIATORS
The Master Agreement
"When James Melamed told me about plans for mediate.com; back in the early '80s ... I said he was nuts. What was I thinking? The vision of Jim and the stellar efforts of mediate.com make it, by far, the centre of the universe for mediators wanting mediation information."
Larry Fong


More Testimonials


READ & SEARCH NEWS
News Categories: Custody, Divorce, Family

1/26: Reducing Work-Family Conflicts in the Workplace May Help People to Sleep Better

New research suggests that reducing conflict between work and familial responsibilities help people sleep better. A multi-institution of researchers found that workers who participated in an intervention aimed at reducing conflict between work and familial responsibilities slept an hour more each week and reported greater sleep sufficiency than those who did not participate in the intervention. read


1/19: Is Collaborative Divorce just mediation in disguise?

This slightly provocative question legitimately arises from the many similarities between the process, approaches, and techniques used in both collaborative divorce and mediation cases. Indeed, both focus on information gathering, goal identification, and option development before solution. Both use interest based approaches, and focus on client self-determination as a guiding principle. Both provide confidentiality and the flexibility to include other professionals within the process. And both rely heavily on active listening, reframing, and emotional acknowledgements. This might lead some to say that Collaborative Divorce is just like mediation, only directed by the collaborative counsel instead of the mediator(s). read


1/13: How to Find a Good Divorce Mediator? Your Five Rules of Thumb

If you came to the conclusion that you prefer to handle your divorce through mediation -- you have made the right choice. Choosing a good divorce mediator is an essential step, and crucial to the success of the process. Here are five rules of thumb in choosing the right mediator for your divorce. read


12/23: Court of Appeal Says Mediation Confidentiality Does Not Apply to Family Law Financial Disclosures

The mediation confidentiality statutes do not apply to mandatory family law financial disclosures, even if the required documents are exchanged during mediation, the Court of Appeal for this district has ruled. Div. Three Thursday granted a writ of mandate to Gina Lappe, the ex-wife of Beverly Hills physician and medical services entrepreneur Murray Lappe. The writ requires Murray Lappe to produce the financial disclosure declaration that he prepared for the couple’s 2011 divorce proceedings, as discovery material in connection with Gina Lappe’s motion to set aside the judgment on grounds of fraud, duress, perjury, and mistake. read


12/04: Aging in Iowa: Mediation program aims to assist Iowa families with difficult aging issues

Mom is growing older. Up to this point, she’s been driving by herself, but she is getting to the age when some family members are concerned about her safety. “It’s one of the big decisions that need to be made,” Iowa City-based mediator Laura Melton Tucker said. “When do (family members) put our foot down with mom and tell her we just aren’t comfortable with her driving anymore?” read


12/01: Woman to run 67 miles to raise money for mediation between families and prisoners

At the center of a group embrace Friday outside Mondawmin Mall's bus depot, Lorig Charkoudian stood bundled up in three layers to help her stay warm on a 67-mile run to Hagerstown. The group — workers and volunteers from Community Mediation Maryland — said the conflict resolution program helps inmates stay out of prison for good by helping them repair relationships with their families. But first, they said, the program must make sure the families of the inmates can get to the prisons. That's where Charkoudian's run comes in. She's hoping to raise $10,000 in donations to pay for the $40 shuttle rides from Baltimore to Western Maryland, many of which leave from Mondawmin's depot. "In a way, the trip is a lot like the trip for the families," said Charkoudian, 41, an ultra-marathon runner who planned to travel 45 miles on foot Friday and another 22 miles on Saturday to the Maryland Correctional Institution in Hagerstown. read


11/18: Family Strife Over Elder Care Consider An Elder Mediator

One or both parents requiring care can create serious stresses and conflicts within families. Sometimes disagreements and misunderstandings over elder care or inheritance issues can lead families to break apart, affecting descendants for generations. To avoid this, elder mediation is available to resolve family disputes that otherwise may go unaddressed or lead to costly and traumatic litigation. A successful resolution can preserve family ties to the benefit of the entire family tree. read


11/04: Getting divorced: a user’s guide

So you’re getting divorced. Quite how you feel about that prospect will, of course, depend on the circumstances. Are you divorcing your spouse or being divorced by them? No one likes to feel like a victim of circumstances we cannot control – that is one of the worst sources of stress that life can throw at us. But relationships are a delicate balance. If your partner decides it’s all over, there is in reality very little you can do. You might – might – be able to persuade them to give it another go, but the cat is out of the bag and the genie is out of the bottle. That delicate balance has taken quite a knock. You cannot unsay the word ‘divorce’. read


10/30: Six Tips for a Simple Divorce

Whatever the trigger for a couple taking such a step, divorce is never an easy or pleasant experience. But there are approaches which can make it more straightforward and somewhat less personally taxing, particularly if there are children involved. Mediation and collaborative law are two possible approaches. Here is a quick introduction to the areas you'll need to think about when deciding what the right approach is for you: read


10/28: How do I negotiate with my spouse's lawyer?

There’s plenty of guidance available to lawyers and judges on how to deal with an unrepresented litigant but I haven’t seen much out there aimed at unrepresented litigants themselves on how to deal with your ex’s lawyer and the judge in your case. Personally I think there is a need for such advice because it is increasingly common to find yourself up against a lawyer representing your ex, especially with the effective abolition last year of legal aid for private family law matters. read


read all

READ & SEARCH NEWS
In every adult a child is hidden that wants to play.


Family & Divorce Mediation Articles



Jennifer Winestone
Best Interests and Little Voices: Child Participation in the Family Mediation Dialogue (1/17/15)
Jennifer Winestone
This article examines the circumstances in which the child's perspective and inclusion is appropriate in divorce mediation and provides guidelines for achieving a safe inclusion process.

Nina Meierding
Looking to the Future: Is There Still A Place For Proactive, Early Intervention Mediation in Our Changing Field? (1/13/15)
Nina Meierding
In the author's experience as a mediator in over 4,000 cases and in almost thirty years of working with advocates, consulting attorneys, and collaborative lawyers, she believes that all forms of mediation are valuable processes which each have their place in helping parties move forward in their conflicts. She takes no position on the "best" process, only that self-determination remains the ultimate goal of any form of mediation. She is hopeful that mediators, participants, and attorneys will re-examine the trend of late intervention, lawyer-centric mediation and bring pro-active, early mediation back as one of the important focuses of the mediation field.

Robyn McDonald
The Critical Role of Mediation in Bridging the Access to Justice Gap (1/09/15)
Robyn McDonald
For more than a decade, Colorado has worked to provide access to justice (ATJ) for its indigent and modest means citizenry. Despite efforts by the bar and the courts, the state continues to struggle in its pursuit. What has been so often overlooked, however, is how mediation provides the courts and litigants an affordable, efficient option to resolving many disputes.

Cris Pastore
Alimony in PA: Friend or Foe in Divorce? (1/09/15)
Cris Pastore
Alimony has become the "black sheep" of divorce law, often viewed as evil, spiteful and punitive. In my opinion, these perceptions are greatly misguided. I see alimony as entirely moral and appropriate, but only when it is necessary. Read my article to understand why.

Joe Markowitz
Selma (1/09/15)
Joe Markowitz
Was there ever an opportunity for peaceful resolution of this civil rights conflict? We see President Johnson acting at times a little bit like a mediator between King and Governor Wallace, but no real attempt was made at creating a dialogue that could resolve the dispute.

Maria Eugenia Sole
Violencia Familiar y ODR - Video en Espanol (1/07/15)
Maria Eugenia Sole
¿Cómo podemos definir la violencia familiar? En primer lugar, podemos decir que la violencia familiar o violencia doméstica es cualquier forma de abuso entre los miembros de una misma familia, de un miembro a otro miembro. Este abuso generalmente causa un daño físico o psicológico a este miembro de la familia.


The Future of Mediation in Different Sectors (1/05/15)
Elinor Robin, Susan Dubow
Mediation has come a long way in the last 4 decades since it was endorsed, but this article examines all of the areas in which mediation still needs to grow.

Tammy Lenski
4 Tips for a Stress-Free New Years (12/26/14)
Tammy Lenski
The holidays can be a cheerful time — with plenty of work, it seems. But with loads of family smashed into tiny spaces, many find themselves feeling less than jolly. Lashing out is common around the holidays. But Dr. Tammy Lenski, a conflict resolution trainer and author of The Conflict Pivot: Turning Conflict into Peace of Mind, has a few tips for keeping your gathering from turning into a war zone.

Phyllis Pollack
Giving Yourself Permission (12/26/14)
Phyllis Pollack
The holidays are upon us, and with them come the usual stress and tension that family events often bring. Over Thanksgiving, I had an experience that put it in perspective for me. Although I am supposed to be the conflict resolution person, it was a cousin that gave me a very much needed "reality check", if not "permission" to think differently about family loyalty.

Bruce Provda
6 Reasons You Need a Prenup (12/19/14)
Bruce Provda
Many divorces happen because of financial problems. A prenup forces both parties to look at — and reveal — their financial picture. An open discussion about finance may help to build a firm foundation for marriage.

Donald T. Saposnek
Mediation Going Forward: What Do We Know? What Can We Expect? (12/17/14)
Donald T. Saposnek
The current complexity of our problems, at least in the U.S., is close to the point of overwhelm; for the individuals involved, for the governments that rule them, for the courts that adjudicate them, for the economic systems that support them, and because of the corrupted values that guide them.

Maria Eugenia Sole
Utilizing Online Dispute Resolution (ODR) for Co-parenting Issues in Families with a History of Domestic Violence (12/17/14)
Maria Eugenia Sole
This video discusses family mediation, domestic violence, and online dispute resolution. Maria Eugenia Sole discusses that different cultures have different definitions--with different understandings of what should be tolerated and what requires help. She also discusses different steps that can help.

Larry Susskind
Retire Already! Why? (12/12/14)
Larry Susskind
This article discusses retirement in non-traditional fields such as mediation and teaching. Should there be a set retirement age?

Meredith Richardson
My Least Favorite Part of Conflict (12/01/14)
Meredith Richardson
My least favorite part of conflict is not the conflict itself, nor is it any argument that may result. It's the aftermath. It could be that the conflict remains unresolved. It could be that things were said that deeply hurt one or both people, and that hurt feelings have been lingering for quite some time and only recently voiced.

Cris Pastore
10 Tips for Choosing the Right Divorce Mediator (11/14/14)
Cris Pastore
Perhaps you've come to the realization that divorce mediation is the way to go for you and your spouse, but how do you choose a divorce mediator? After all, not all divorce mediators are created equal.

Jennifer Winestone
The Art and Science of Mediation: How the Principles of Commitment/Consistency and Expectation May be Applied to Mediation to Help Break Party Impasse - Part One (11/14/14)
Jennifer Winestone
This article provides a review of two psychological concepts derived from Robert Cialdini's "Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion" and Dan Ariely's "Predictably Irrational" and considers their practical and ethical implications as applied to mediation.

Michael Scott
Themes in Mediation (11/10/14)
Michael Scott
Hidden beneath the arguments of a couple in mediation there is a repeating theme. The argument is like Joseph’s coat of many colors. Each disagreement on the surface appears to be about something different, like one of the many colors on the coat. Under the coat, however, there is only Joseph, who remains mostly unchanged.

Doris Tennant
Reflections on Everything is Workable: A Zen Approach to Conflict Resolution (10/31/14)
Doris Tennant
Everything is Workable (Shambhala, 2013) is Hamilton’s book about how to live consciously in a world sated with conflicts. She acknowledges that learning conflict skills asks something of us: “The more intimate we become with human suffering, the greater our compulsion to serve others.”

Cris Pastore
The Shocking Cost of Divorce in PA (10/31/14)
Cris Pastore
The added expense of living in two separate households may be obvious in a divorce case, but have you also budgeted for the cost of hiring a divorce lawyer to go to court? Read this article to gain a full understanding of the fees associated with a divorce lawyer and understand why divorce mediation may the better option for you.

Dr. Lynne C. Halem
Dividing Stuff (10/24/14)
Dr. Lynne C. Halem
Most people do not think of their household belongings as assets. It is, after all, just “stuff”. Except, that is, if asked to view the stuff as property subject to division in divorce. Then, suddenly, even the smallest or most insignificant items are seen in a whole new light, indeed take on a whole new value.

Maria Simpson
Gender and Decision-Making (10/24/14)
Maria Simpson
Men and women are pretty much equally good decision-makers when under low stress levels, but “When stressed, men are more prone to taking risky bets with little payoff.”

Morna Ellis
Mediation - The Savvy Choice (10/21/14)
Morna Ellis
Elder mediation can be helpful for families trying to make difficult decisions. It helps children and parents make decisions that include everyone's opinions.

Meredith Richardson
Fall is a Time to Reap What You've Sown (10/21/14)
Meredith Richardson
Fall is in the air. The nights are cooler and longer. The apples at local farms are almost ready to be picked. If you've been taking care of yourself and your relationships, then spending time at home with your loved ones may be quite pleasant.

Cris Pastore
When You Might Need Mediation After Divorce (10/13/14)
Cris Pastore
When the divorce mediation process succeeds, spouses and their families often report a tremendous benefit from having chosen the option. However, there are still times when ex-spouses, even if they remain amicable after divorce, may need post-divorce mediation.

Sarah Peyton
Compassion for Your Clients (10/13/14)
Sarah Peyton
One surprising way to think about trauma is not by measuring the magnitude of the horrific event, but rather by measuring the extent to which the person who experiences the tragedy is left alone with it. This article provides a useful reminder that we can never understand the pain that our clients have encountered, and that we might be providing one of the only safe places in their life for them to discuss what they are going through.

Meredith Richardson
When Trust is Broken (10/13/14)
Meredith Richardson
Do you want to be right or do you want to be in relationship? This can be one of the hardest questions to answer.

Jennifer Shack
How to Mediate High-Conflict Cases: Balance and Control (10/05/14)
Jennifer Shack
Like a lot of ADR researchers, I’m always interested to know what really happens in the black box that is the mediation session. So, when someone pries the box open to look inside, my eyes light up. Researchers have begun using conversation analysis to uncover what happens in mediation that leads to successful outcomes. The latest contribution to this research comes from Norway, with a study of 154 custody mediations.

Cinnie Noble
I Hate When He . . . (10/04/14)
Cinnie Noble
Lately I have been hearing several of my friends complaining about their life partners. It seems it is more than usual, but maybe I am just more aware of their plaints these days for some reason. The gripes typically start with “I hate when he (or she)…” and the “odious” acts, as they perceive them, may be how the person answers the phone, eats, flosses, leaves laundry on the floor, makes puns, and on and on.

Halee Burg
Creating A Foundation for Cohabitation (10/03/14)
Halee Burg
You are in a committed relationship. You and your significant other desire to live together but are not ready for or interested in marriage. You decide to rent or purchase a property together, or to move into a place one of you currently rents or owns. You are in good company, joining over eight million cohabiting couples in the United States.

Cris Pastore
Divorce Mediation Sessions: What Goes on Behind Closed Doors (9/26/14)
Cris Pastore
If you are considering using divorce mediation as the option for your separation or divorce, you might find it helpful to understand what is actually discussed in the mediation room.

Laurie Israel
Is Mediating Prenups a Form of Marital Mediation? (9/19/14)
Laurie Israel
I have been noticing a trend in my practice lately: the first draft of prenuptial agreements generally sketched out a marriage with no guaranteed financial interplay.

Rachel Ehrlich
Shhhh! The Big Risk Associated With Mediation Confidentiality Nobody Talks About (9/05/14)
Rachel Ehrlich
In complex civil disputes it is not uncommon for information to be provided through mediation and that information is often subject to mediation confidentiality. When related disputes (contractual indemnity, insurance carrier contribution, insurance coverage and bad faith, and reinsurance) arise, mediation confidentiality prohibits using the information relied upon as evidence in the related matter.

Cris Pastore
6 Major Mistakes to Avoid in a Do-It-Yourself Divorce (9/05/14)
Cris Pastore
Although spouses claim to have everything worked out, they almost always fail to consider some very important details. Read this article and learn the 6 common mistakes to avoid when attempting to resolve your own divorce.

Dan Simon
Law Professor Transformed (9/05/14)
Dan Simon
Professor Sherry Colb, who teaches criminal procedure and evidence at Cornell Law School, took a training in transformative mediation this spring and it blew her mind. You can read the full text of the article she wrote about it here. In her article Colb explains the fundamentally different assumptions that underly the legalistic paradigm as compared to the transformative paradigm. Here are a dozen of the insights that the training inspired in her:

Rolando Perlaza Perez
Resolucion Alterna de Conflictos en Costa Rica y la Apertura Hacia Nuevas Formas de Gestionar el Conflicto (9/01/14)
Rolando Perlaza Perez
Hace 17 años en Costa Rica se promulgó la Ley Sobre Resolución Alterna de Conflictos y Promoción de la Paz Social ley número 7727 (Ley RAC) y se iniciaron campañas de formación y concientización de la ciudadanía sobre las ventajas y bondades de la solución pacífica, dialogada y colaborativa del conflicto. Desde entonces, Costa Rica ha avanzado en el desarrollo y fortalecimiento de los métodos tradicionales de RAC (Resolución Alterna de Conflictos), entiéndase Arbitraje, Mediación/conciliación, Negociación y en los últimos años los Círculos de Paz. Incluso en el año 2011 se promulgó la Ley Sobre Arbitraje Comercial internacional Ley 8937, que sienta las bases para que Costa Rica sirva de Sede para arbitrajes internacionales de naturaleza comercial.

Judy Ringer
Conflict Resolution for Kids (8/22/14)
Judy Ringer
My good friend and colleague, Thomas Crum, taught me a lot of what I know about having hard conversations. A method he uses with children - the BLT - is so simple and easy to remember, I often use it and have found it to work very well with children and adults: Breathe, Learn, Talk.

Martin Svatos
When the Mediators Pay the Highest Price (8/22/14)
Martin Svatos
Recent development in the Near East reminds how long and disastrous the Arabic-Israeli conflict is. Unfortunately, it has already claimed thousands of victims and every one of these tragedies could narrate a specific and sad story. One among them is especially important to be commemorated since it recounts a life and work of the first UN mediator who had saved thousands of prisoners in the Second World War and who was later killed carrying out his duties.

Cris Pastore
Using the 17 Factors of Alimony in PA in Divorce Mediation (8/15/14)
Cris Pastore
Curious about how alimony is determined in Pennsylvania? Read this comprehensive article and learn about alimony and about the 17 factors the court considers in determining it.

Hilary Linton
Understanding Each Party’s Power in Family Mediation-Arbitration: Why it is Critical (7/25/14)
Hilary Linton
A recent Ontario Superior Court of Justice decision illustrates the need for clearer guidelines for “screening for power imbalances and domestic violence”, a mandatory component of Ontario family arbitration. It also demonstrates the benefits for parties, lawyers and arbitrators in understanding that some methods of screening are more effective than others; and in ensuring that screening is done in accordance with the best practices before the mediation in a mediation-arbitration.

Jeffrey Fink
Mediating Inheritance Disputes (7/18/14)
Jeffrey Fink
Inheritance disputes can be difficult to resolve. They are tied up in a lifetime of emotions toward the deceased and every other claimant under the will, as well as personal and spousal expectations of monetary gain. Here are 10 tips and tricks that have helped with this kind of dispute.

Katherine Graham
Case Study: The Mediating Manager (7/18/14)
Katherine Graham
Sian is the Communications Manager for a UK charity and has recently appointed James, a designer whose job required frequent contact with production officer Helga, who had worked with Sian for over 3 years. Sian had a sinking feeling that things were not going too well between James and Helga, but Sian was busy and, optimistically, had put the tensions down to early teething troubles and hoped she could leave them to sort out their differences ‘as adults’.

Mary Aderibigbe
Insecurity in Nigeria : Focus on Social Protection (7/16/14)
Mary Aderibigbe
The spate of insecurity has become alarming. There have been calls for stringency of laws to bring culprits to justice. Security operatives go after the perpetrators and turn over those apprehended to the courts -- yet the conditions that breed revolt are worsening. This spells real danger!

Bruce Provda
GPS and Divorce Mediation (7/07/14)
Bruce Provda
GPS systems are starting to make their way into divorce proceedings. When infidelity is suspected, being able to produce digital confirmation of an spouse’s movements can provide powerful ammunition and lay a strong foundation for the remainder of the mediation process.

Joan B. Kelly, Ph.D.
Pioneer Series: Families Closer Post-Divorce - Video (7/04/14)
Joan B. Kelly, Ph.D.
Joan Kelly describes a research finding which concluded that families who mediated during the divorce had father's who were significantly more involved in their children's lives twelve years post-mediation.

Richard Barbieri
A Song of Loss for Divorce Mediators (6/30/14)
Richard Barbieri
I was recently asked to give a presentation in an advanced seminar on Mediating with Families in Transition. I thought at first of the many film scenes that I have previously utilized, from the opening of Wedding Crashers to The War of the Roses. I then realized that most of my artistic experience of lost love comes through music, rather than film, and so I prepared a new presentation based on favorite songs about the effects of divorce.   1 Comment

Mary Novak
Values and Interests Revealed in Detroit “Grand Bargain” (6/30/14)
Mary Novak
The story of the Detroit bankruptcy mediation’s emerging “Grand Bargain” (as it has been dubbed in the media) is a fascinating case of many different groups working to protect their chosen interests. The bargain demonstrates how mediation allows parties to consider what they are willing to give in order to secure the things that matter most to them, and how traditional rivals may collaborate for a shared goal.

Constance Ahrons
Pioneer Series: Old Dissolution Model Was Damaging - Video (6/29/14)
Constance Ahrons
Constance Ahrons discusses the pre-joint-cutody model for the relationship between Ex-spouses. The cultural norm was to have no relationship, because that meant that the ex-spouses where hanging on.

Nina Meierding
Pioneer Series: Cultural Sensitivity while Training - Video (6/27/14)
Nina Meierding
Nina Meierding discusses her approach to mediation training in other countries. This involves being culturally sensitive, not imposing the Western model as it may not be useful for other cultures and their ways of problem-solving.


Faith-Based Mediation: What is it and does it matter? (6/21/14)
Leslie Short, Joyce P. Dugger
This article is defining what we believe a faith based mediation is seen and practice through the lens of being inclusive of all faith and belief system. This article asks two question "What is faith" and "Does it Matter" we explore these two questions understanding the process of embracing all faith. To create a dialog that opens all faith to come to the table without being judge.

Dr. Lynne C. Halem
Post-Divorce Blues: Unresolved Issues and New Problems Unsettle Divorced Spouses (6/13/14)
Dr. Lynne C. Halem
Months, even years, of haggling and anxiety were finally at an end. A new beginning was in the offering. Yet the initial relief, may be filled with sadness, and may well be short-lived. Divorced couples are often faced with agreements that do little to help them navigate an evolving, and even rocky, future. Mediation provides an agreement which is clear and specific as to beginning points and ends, as to the details of property, support, and the children, including education, death, and taxes, provides insurance for protecting couples from the surprises of tomorrow. agreement which is clear and specific as to beginning points and ends, as to the details of property, support, and the children, including education, death, and taxes, provides insurance for protecting couples from the surprises of tomorrow.

Click here for MORE ARTICLES



Mediate.com Web Site Package

Copyright 1996-2015 © Resourceful Internet Solutions, Inc. All rights reserved.
(671) Guam
Civil / Legal
Lou Chang
List Here
Change Area Code:  

Mediate.com University Online Streaming Courses and Resources



Caseload Mangager