As a relatively new student of mediation but a practitioner of AiKiDo for many years the article will help me blend the philosophies of Mediation and AiKiDo into a more holistic approach to both arts.
Ippei , Darwin NT 10/27/10
Whilst I personally do not deliver divorce meditations I do reflect on Aikido principles as part of my mediation practice.
Parties to a conflict must acknowledge its existence - rather than trying to avoid or deny it, accept their involvement, appreciate the feelings and viewpoints of all parties to the problem - without making judgments, and be open to new ideas that might lead to solutions.
According to the founder of Aikido Morihei Ueshiba
"As soon as you concern yourself with the 'good' and 'bad' of your fellows, you create an opening in your heart for maliciousness to enter. Testing, competing with, and criticizing others weaken and defeat you."
Larry , Modesto ca 10/13/10
The author seems to be attached to divorce mediation rather than marital mediation.
Michael , Saint Louis MO firstname.lastname@example.org 10/12/10
Cool. What I like about this is it expands on some basic mediation priniples--I see the blending as acknowledgement and looping--I see the extending as reality testing. The most useful thing I've learned from this is the utilization component. With high conflict couples it does not work to lecture or persuade them. The utilization seems to me to be a really good way to turn their non-constructive energy into contructive energy. The part I disagree with the most is the attachment component. I am personally attatched to conflict RESOLUTION. Sorry. However, even in this I see the author's point to a degree. The client's process is the client's process. I think letting that process go forward in the way the client needs it to go forward is an important tool in conflict resolution!