One of the most interesting people I know just happens to be 100 years old. Mr. Raynes is long retired from a career as a pharmacist in Dayton, Ohio but he still volunteers at the local hospital. I’m not exactly certain what he does there, but one thing I know for sure is that anyone who has the opportunity to come into contact with him is one lucky dog. His gentle spirit and fascinating stories will suck you in from the get-go. At least I know they did me when I first met him a number of years ago.
I was thinking about him recently and realized his 100 years on this earth have probably given him quite a bit of insight into conflict and relationships in general. I asked him to share some wisdom with me so that I could share it with you. After thinking long and hard about it (weeks actually), he finally replied with, “Don’t hold grudges. Nobody wins.”
I thought about adding a few hundred words about the problems with grudges but I think I’ll just leave it at that. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t need me to expound on his thought because, well, it’s pretty clear. Instead, I’ll just thank him for the reminder. “Don’t hold grudges. Nobody wins.” Got it.
Vivian Scott is a Professional Certified Mediator and the author of Conflict Resolution at Work For Dummies. She spent many years in the competitive and often stress-filled world of high tech marketing where she realized resolving conflict within the confines of office politics was paramount to success. Through creative solutions to common conflicts she was able to bring various entities together, both internally and externally, for the betterment of projects and a productive working environment.
Prior to retiring from Microsoft in 1999 she developed the “America at Work” video series, a six-part program featuring small businesses employing technology in attention-grabbing ways. “America at Work” aired on the USA Network and received the Silver Screen Award from the International Film and Video Festival for outstanding creativity. Using discerning negotiation, mediation, and problem-solving skills, she successfully worked with others to co-create “How-to Guides”, “Seminar in a Box”, and even one of the first on-line Guerrilla Marketing books.
Since her retirement, Ms. Scott has gone on to earn a B.A. in Interdisciplinary Arts & Sciences with a concentration in American Studies from the University of Washington. She completed an extensive practicum with the Dispute Resolution Center of Snohomish & Island Counties where she has mediated numerous cases, helping parties resolve conflict in workplace, family, and other disputes. Her private mediation practice has handled cases ranging from assisting business partners in ending their relationship to creating a new working environment within a law firm. Ms. Scott is a member of the Washington Mediation Association and spends a majority of her time advocating embracing peace in a volatile world.
Her book, Conflict Resolution at Work For Dummies, can be found in bookstores, on www.amazon.com, www.dummies.com, or any number of on-line bookseller sites.