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Moving from the Shadows into the Sunlight

by Lorraine Segal
April 2015

Conflict Remedy Blog by Lorraine Segal

Lorraine Segal

Most of the shadows of this life are caused by our standing in our own sunshine.–Ralph Waldo Emerson

We have a choice

Perhaps my biggest learning on my own journey to healing and recovery is that I have a choice at any moment, to continue to stand in a shadow of my own creation, or to change my attitude so I can move into light, trust, faith and optimism. Your attitude makes the difference.

My attitude makes the difference.

So often I can feel mired in darkness and discouragement, mad at myself or someone else, sure nothing good will ever happen. And, I have learned that what makes it turn around is often a change in my attitude rather than a change in external circumstances.

I recently had an experience of this when I had to leave my wonderful office of over four years. It wasn’t my choice, but the organization I rented from needed the space for a new partnership they were embarking on. My first response was to feel upset and victimized. I had the perfect office, an oasis of serenity. I hadn’t done anything wrong, why did I have to move?

Then I realized, that between my teaching on site, and the increasing number of clients I “see” on the phone, that it wasn’t serving me to have the responsibility of a full time office any more. It took a lot of work and thought, but with help I fixed up a home office, which is even more beautiful than my old one. And, it glows with light in a way my old office never did. It feels like I am letting the light of the Universe into my business life in a new and exciting way.

You have a choice at every moment.

And, as I tell my clients, you, too, can choose at any moment to change your perspective on people and events in your live. I don’t think any of us can remember to do this all the time, but it is possible to shift your thinking, and then get faster and better at making the change.

How? The steps are simple:

1. Become aware of the story you’re telling that may be keeping you in the shadow.

2. Be willing and open to a new, more positive perspective.

3. Practice and repeat new ways of thinking and feeling.

In my case, I have cut my expenses and shortened my commute to 20 feet! A difficult challenge truly has become a wonderful opportunity.

Biography


Lorraine Segal is a certified Conflict Management coach and teacher, specializing in communication and conflict resolution in the workplace. For many years a middle manager and tenured community college professor, she has her own business, Conflict Remedy LLC.

In her organizational consulting, classes, and coaching, she helps people learn new skills, get “unstuck” from negative stories, and shift their patterns of thinking and reacting so they can learn to: communicate clearly, resolve conflict effectively, and contribute to a more harmonious and productive workplace.

She currently teaches at Sonoma State University, Santa Rosa Junior College, and St. Joseph Health Life Learning Center (Memorial Hospital) and works with various businesses and organizations. 



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Website: www.ConflictRemedy.com

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