Exercise Caution in Relationship with Employee
Q: I hired a female employee six months ago who I can really talk to. We both experienced a nasty breakup in our personal lives and commiserating with each other is getting us through some rough times.
My problem is my business partner, who insists I'm heading for trouble. He complains about the expensive gifts and extra time off I give her and points out performance issues that he says I should address. He argues that when I finally come to my senses and realize she can't do the job, our "little friendship" might give her grounds for a sexual harassment claim. So what if I cut her some extra slack and give her a few nice things — what's wrong with a male business owner having a special friendship with a female employee?
A: No one would disagree that a business owner and an employee should have a good working relationship. But adding "special friendship" to the mix is what has your business partner raising the red flag. The definitions of employer and friend describe quite different relationships between people — your potential for trouble starts in the most significant differences:
The employer exercises control over an employee determining work hours, performance expectations, etc. When you let the friendship determine how you exercise that control — like ignoring performance issues — you open the door for problems. Cutting your employee a little extra slack is a problem when the reason for doing so is tied to your relationship with that employee. If the relationship changes, you're likely to exercise that control differently, setting the stage for a sexual harassment or retaliation claim.
Friends expect preferential treatment just because they are your friends. Another word for preferential treatment in the work place — like extra time off — is favoritism. Not only does favoritism create jealousy and insecurity for other employees, it isn't unusual for a discrimination claim to arise as a result of a personnel decision being made in favor of an employee engaged in a personal relationship with the decision maker. And those expensive gifts — not only do they smack of favoritism (unless you are as generous with your other employees) — they are also likely subject to tax regulations if you're not paying for them personally.
The workplace must be a level playing field for all of your employees, so exercise caution in personal relationships. In any case, you must be employer first and friend second.
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