2600 El Camino Real, Suite 502
Palo Alto, CA 94306
Phone: 650-322-2464

Marital Mediation Articles


From Behind the Glass: Mandatory Family Law Mediation (5/16/13)
Amanda Fletcher
This article sets out a plan of attack for how an attorney can effectively advocate for their client in a mandatory family law mediation setting where the attorney is excluded from the mediation session.


Mediation Case Law Video: Enforcing Oral Mediation Settlement Agreement (5/13/13)
James Coben
In the case Ledbetter v Ledbetter, the appellate court considered the issue of whether parties to a divorce mediation should be bound to a settlement orally dictated by the mediator and affirmed by parties and their counsel at mediation, which was later repudiated by one of the parties.


The Gray Divorce (5/03/13)
Denise Tamir
Though the fact that divorce has become more common and less of a stigma has some impact, that does not explain why the gray divorce rate is climbing while the general divorce rate is going down. Denise Tamir suggests a few contributing factors.


10 Helpful Tips for Mediating Child Related Issues (5/03/13)
Lisa Nelson
The article provides helpful tips and considerations for parents to address in divorce mediation when minor children are involved. There are specific considerations that parents need to be made aware of before they enter the mediation process with children.


I'm Heading for Divorce. How do I Start? (4/26/13)
Rachel Virk
This article walks through the divorce process for someone who is just beginning to consider a divorce. It gives a practical guide for people to navigate through the process without an emotional roller coaster.


New Perspective on Domestic Violence and Mediation in Montana (4/26/13)
Mary Novak
The original Montana provisions for family court mediation, enacted in 1993, attempted to shield abuse survivors from attending mediation with their abusers. This reflected a national focus on the issue at the time. Section 40-4-301 of the Montana Code Annotated allowed courts to require any parties to participate in family law mediation. However, it made an exception for domestic violence.


Preparing for Mediation: A Practical Guide to Mediator Selection (4/22/13)
Greg Stone
Greg Stone's latest book Preparing for Mediation: A Practical Guide provides straight-forward tips for mediators. This excerpt from his book discusses considerations for selecting mediators. It also suggests ways for mediators to allow their clients to save face while making progress in the mediation.


Is Collaborative Law Worth the Cost? (4/22/13)
Dick Price
For people facing divorce, a common question is whether Collaborative cases are "cheaper than litigation". While there is no way to compare a specific Collaborative case to an abstract idea of a litigated case, we can say that Collaborative Law will avoid a lot of the expense involved in litigation.


5 Effective Ways to Focus on What’s Important in Relationship Conflict (4/22/13)
Tammy Lenski
How do you decide how much of a relationship conflict’s flotsam is worth pursuing? How do you focus on the important matters in a relationship conflict and not get sidetracked by trivial ones?


On Spin Cycle (3/15/13)
Vivian Scott
Here we go; round and round. That’s the sound of the all-too-familiar family whirlpool in which one person (usually the woman) asks that a chore get done and the other person (usually a man) seems agreeable but never quite gets it done. She starts tip-toeing around the subject, he avoids it, she gets louder, he acts like she’s a nag, and now they’re on spin cycle with no forward progress in sight.


Five Tips to Let Go and Forgive after a Break-Up (3/15/13)
Lorraine Segal
Learning how to let go and forgive helped me a lot after two “break-ups.” Neither of these was with a spouse or romantic partner, but they were deep and difficult and painful nonetheless.


Informative Mediation -- A New Model for Tough Economic Times (Part 2) (3/01/13)
Rachel Virk
Not everyone distrusts or has reason to distrust his or her spouse in a divorce.  Not everyone needs an advocate to actively and adversarially negotiate, but instead can use the attorney in his or her corner for advice, for information and for document reviews.  Not everyone needs to pay for a two-attorney collaborative process. How can a divorce attorney best serve this market?  The answer may be the process of "Informative Mediation," described in this two-part article.


The Dangers of Badmouthing Your Ex To The Kids (2/08/13)
Jeff Murphy
Getting a divorce is tough on any couple, but it’s even tougher on the kids. Think about them when you’re tempted to bad mouth your ex. The outcome may be very different from the one you planned.


Four Keys to Successfully Mediating Temporary Orders in a Divorce Case (1/25/13)
Scott Morgan
This article offers tips from a practicing divorce attorney on how to effectively mediate temporary orders terms in a divorce case. Scott Morgan offers his thoughts on how to prepare the case for mediation, necessary preparation of the client for mediation, how to negotiate terms intelligently, and the proper mindset the attorney should have.


How to Start a Collaborative Divorce (1/25/13)
Dick Price
Since Collaborative Law is still relatively new, many people may feel unsure about how to start the process. It's actually very simple.


Ten Commandments of Divorce (1/18/13)
Donna Martini
This article is an excerpt from the book, Ten Commandments of Divorce. This article encourages people going through a divorce to take the time to move slowly, act with respect, and create a safe space for their children.


Family Basics and Divorce Mediation - Video (1/14/13)
Gabriel Cheong, Esq.
Divorce and Family Mediation Basics Video. This is a question and answer video that tries to answer all of the basic divorce questions.


25 Prenuptual Questions (1/11/13)
Kenneth Cloke
Ken Cloke suggests 25 prenuptual questions that are helpful for couples mediation. These questions are designed more to facilitate a strong marriage than a smooth divorce.


On Weathering Marriage Communication Style Differences (1/11/13)
Tammy Lenski
Marriages can successfully weather significant communication style differences. It helps to set the foundation for success early, but if that boat’s already sailed, fear not — you can still change its direction.


Reducing Stress Through Divorce Mediation (1/04/13)
Nancy Tran
This article discusses the ways in which mediation can help to reduce the stress that couples undergoing divorce may experience. By creating a cooperative atmosphere, reducing the time that divorce proceedings take, and lessening the financial burden of a divorce, mediated divorce may be the perfect solution for couples looking to amicably end their marriage.


Tips for Better Communication During a Divorce (1/04/13)
Dick Price
In any divorce, things get heated occasionally (or more often). In Collaborative divorces, the parties can still feel considerable stress. It is an emotional experience. Sometimes, parties will react emotionally, in anger, and that is regrettable. Here are some quick tips to help maintain a constructive relationship between the parties.


Family Business Conflict: Flexible Solutions (12/21/12)
Karen LaRose
In a family business conflict, relationships are embedded in a system of family dynamics and a business system. It is impossible to separate the two components: familial relationships and business relationships. One informs the other in a circular fashion. This article discusses the correct mediation approach to working with the two systems.


What Is Mediation – Revisited (11/30/12)
Diane Cohen
Within the field of family and divorce mediation, there exist two different types of mediations and two different types of processes which depend upon the needs and desires of the parties. Any given couple could at one point desire and need "structural divorce mediation" and at another point desire and need "impasse divorce mediation." The processes are not interchangeable. They serve different needs within the same field, although there is undoubtedly some overlap between the two.


Whose House is MY House for Christmas: Mommy’s or Daddy’s? (11/16/12)
Jeff Murphy
Before we are in the midst of the Holiday season, separated and divorced couples should take a moment to walk through their expectations. When it comes to protecting children and safeguarding their holiday experience, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.


The Broken Family (11/16/12)
Jeffrey Krivis
The Central Valley of California, known for its good weather and rich soil, is considered the breadbasket of the country. The many people who live in this agricultural community work hard. They know that the literal fruits of their labors feed people, and are proud of their role in society.


Using the TKI Tool for Divorce Mediation (10/26/12)
Ralph Kilmann
Ralph Kilmann discusses applying the TKI instrument to family and divorce mediations. The key is using the instrument to helping couples from competitive to distributive bargaining.


An Open Letter from the ABA (10/19/12)
Kim Taylor
Conflict is an inevitable part of life — from our jobs, to our families to our communities. Sometimes, serious situations can’t be solved by the people involved. The first place we think of going to is the courthouse. But it is not the only place. If your case could be heard fairly and resolved quickly without a judge or jury, would you consider it?


Support for Men in Divorce (10/12/12)
Paula Lawhon
A while back, I posted a link to a support group which focuses on helping women through the difficult transition of divorce or separation (although they also work with men). This is my belated follow up link for a support group which focuses on helping men through this same difficult transition (although he also works with women).


Patience, Please! (10/12/12)
Dick Price
Sometimes, people get anxious to get their divorce over with. That's understandable. Divorce is stressful, difficult and often unpleasant. It's usually not a good experience, unless you and your spouse both are still cordial with each other and both want to move fairly quickly through the process. Even if things start out well, try not to be in too big a hurry.


Antidote for Divorce is to Nip it in the Bud (10/12/12)
Mary Aderibigbe
This article demonstrates through a case that divorce could be averted if properly managed at the source. It started with an issue which could over time degenerate or escalate to a point that it threatens the relationship. It is evident that every disagreement has a potential of causing a breakup. The solution is to resolve challenges as they arise to keep a marriage strong.


Why Prenups Are Bad For Your Marital Health (10/06/12)
Laurie Israel
Selfishness kills a marriage.  Generosity makes it thrive.  Your mediator can help you discover options that will protect that generosity without a prenup, or show you how to make the prenup less restrictive. 


Five Sure-Fire Signs You Need Couple Mediation (10/01/12)
Gary Direnfeld
It can be difficult to know if your relationship would benefit from going to see a mediator. This author offers five suggestions for examining your relationship to see if it's time to schedule an appointment with a mediator.


The Shalom Bayit Divorce (10/01/12)
Denise Tamir
Shalom Bayit, literally "peace in the home," is the Jewish imperative to maintain a respectful and harmonious household. The values of Shalom Bayit may be applied to the manner in which a husband and wife, who for whatever reason have decided their marriage can not be saved, make their way through the divorce process.


Why You Shouldn't Negotiate with Your Spouse (8/27/12)
Dick Price
As a Collaborative case progresses, one or both of the parties often want to "save time" or "save money" by negotiating directly with their spouse, outside of the joint Collaborative meetings. That's usually a bad idea from my experience.


Collaborative Divorce (8/06/12)
Gary Direnfeld
This article explains some of the specifics of the collaborative process for divorcing couples. It discusses who will be involved and who is subject to the collaborative policies.


5 Sources of Conflict - Video (8/06/12)
Diana Mercer
The 5 Sources of Conflict. This is an excerpt from a 25-hour basic family mediation training that is offered in the Los Angeles area by Diana Mercer.


Balance Listening and Limits with Storming Teens (7/23/12)
Lorraine Segal
How can parents stay loving and detached but still listen when challenged by preteens and new teens? My favorite pediatrician, T Berry Brazelton, advises parents of teens who are being challenged or insulted to say calmly, “I’m interested in what you have to say, but you’ll have to find another way of saying it.” (Press Democrat Tuesday December 13, 2011)


Collaborative Divorce Explained - Video (6/26/12)
Dr. Ellie Izzo
Dr. Ellie Izzo, an expert in the field, explains the details and benefits to a Collaborative Divorce. She discusses how Tiger Woods decides to put his children first in an amicable divorce.


Co-Parenting Skills: Credit Where Credit is Due (6/25/12)
Nancy Hudgins
I conducted a divorce mediation recently where the parties have been separated for many years but now have started the divorce process by coming to mediation. They have been co-parenting their children during the separation. We have worked through most of the issues involved and are very close to resolution. What was to be the last session turned out to be the next-to-last session.


Co-Parenting Skills: Credit Where Credit is Due (6/11/12)
Nancy Hudgins
I conducted a divorce mediation recently where the parties have been separated for many years but now have started the divorce process by coming to mediation. They have been co-parenting their children during the separation. We have worked through most of the issues involved and are very close to resolution. What was to be the last session turned out to be the next-to-last session.

Click here for MORE ARTICLES



Search Mediate.com

Search: and/or search terms 



This site managed with Dynamic Website Technology from Mediate.com
Products and Services